


My Heart Will Go On

by mangosmoothiecoran



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Everyone is mostly just mentioned, I had this idea before s8 aired, M/M, NO MORE ANGST, and since it didn't happen I still really wanted to write it, but there is a happy ending, don't worry everything else from here on out is going to be happy, im so sorry for writing this, im sorry, set during s8 and after, shiro and matt centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-22 12:11:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17059532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mangosmoothiecoran/pseuds/mangosmoothiecoran
Summary: "I’ve always wanted to live on the beach, a relaxing place to waste away.” Shiro doesn’t know what to say, nothing makes sense.





	My Heart Will Go On

**Author's Note:**

> Hello Everyone! I am so sorry this took so long, but here is my first out of 4(5?) one shots I am making after watching s8. Don't get me started on s8, just accept my writings. I had this idea before s8 aired, and since none of it happened I decided to still write it because I really loved the idea. I'm sorry for writing this, but please accept the happy ending. 
> 
> Based on Celine Dion's song "My Heart Will Go On". Please listen to it while reading! ^^

      Shiro panted as he watched the scene in front of him unfold. They had managed to track down one of Haggar’s Robobeasts and Voltron, the rebels, and the Garrison pilots had all been deployed. It was intense, more intense than anything Voltron had gone up against in the past, and while Shiro had faith in his team, the pilots and rebels were in normal crafts, one blast and they’d be done for.

      Assisting in any way the Atlas could, Shiro tried to calm his head as he watched Voltron struggle to keep up while the smaller crafts gave them a few seconds here and there to breathe before heading back into the fight. A particular green rebel ship was on Shiro’s radar constantly. Matt Holt, rebel commander and loving brother to Pidge, was the most active in trying to direct the Robobeast’s attention. It was nerve wrecking to watch, Shiro couldn’t bare the thought of what would happen if Matt wasn’t careful enough

     “SHIRO!” Keith’s urgent tone rang throughout the bridge.

     “The rebels and pilots are going to be killed if they stay out here any longer! Call them back! We have a plan they’ve done their part!” Shiro immediately commanded Coran to send out a message and call everyone back in.

      “EVERYONE! FALL BACK VOLTRONS GOT THIS!” Shiro received confirmations from everyone and sighed in relief knowing they would all be back safely on board. Looking over to Coran, the ginger-haired man was already looking at him with a knowing expression. Excusing himself, even though the time was not right, Shiro left the bridge and headed down to the loading bays.

     Making it in record time, Shiro immediately scanned the crowd for his friend. Seeing him leaning against another rebel for support, Shiro breathed a sigh of relief upon noticing minor bruises and scrapes was all he had. Walking over to him, the rebels stood straighter upon seeing him.

     “Sir! Nothing serious to report, just need some bandages and ice packs.” Shiro nodded, that was always good to hear in battle.

     “Thank you. Matt, how are you doing?” Matt looked up at him and gave a half smile.

     “I’m doing fine Shiro, just got rocked around a bit.” Shiro nodded to the rebel keeping Matt upright and grabbed Matt’s free arm and placed it around his shoulders. Matt transitioned from leaning on his companion to leaning up against Shiro.

     “I’ll take Matt to the medical bay, you guys head to your other stations and secure the ships.” Everyone barked out a ‘yes sir’ and Shiro walked away with Matt in tow. Once they were out of the loading dock, Shiro felt ten times better.

     “You didn’t have to come down here Shiro. We can handle what happens, we’ve fought in extreme battles before.” Shiro sighed, he knew that, he just needed Matt’s presence to reassure him that everything was okay.

     “I know, but after everything that has happened, besides Keith, you’re all I really have left Matt. You’re my friend, I won’t let this war take you too.” Matt smiled at that, looking at the ground instead of at Shiro.

     “Thanks Shiro, I know you’ve always got my back.” Shiro nodded his head, gripping Matt’s wrist a little tighter so he could feel the pulse, coming back to reality in the process.

* * *

 

     It was a quiet day aboard the Atlas. Voltron had defeated a Robobeast, and was currently in route with the Atlas to another. Shiro stared at the vast expanse of space that flooded the bridge’s windows. It was always a breathtaking sight, despite having seen so much of it for the past few years. Receiving a small click from the panel in front of him, Shiro saw it was his scheduled two-hour break. Nodding to the crew, he walked out and headed to the eating area.

     The elevator ride lasted barely a minute, and Shiro found himself sitting down with a plate of food in record time. Not many people were eating as Shiro’s breaks tended to be at random hours, which could be during the rush period or not. Hunk came by for a few minutes to make sure the food was okay and that he was doing okay in general. Shiro gave him a smile and told him not to worry. Somewhat satisfied, Hunk walked back into the kitchen area. Continuing to eat his dish, Shiro heard the elevator doors open and close and a set of footsteps come toward him.

     “Well, well, well, if it isn’t Shiro. Kind of surprised to have a break the same time as you.” Shiro smiled at his best friend who grinned as he sat down, back against the table and elbows propped up on it.

     “What have you been up to Holt? Getting into mischief?” Matt gasped, mocking hurt as he glared at Shiro.

     “How dare you say such a thing. I’ll have you know, the only mischievous thing I’ve done lately is sleep in an extra hour.” Shiro rolled his eyes.

     “Ooo, someone stop you, you’re a mad man.” Matt laughed, shoving Shiro’s shoulder a bit as the other failed to get his noodle on his spoon.

     “No, but seriously, this is great. We’ve been so busy lately that I don’t get a chance to really talk to you. You’re either saving my ass, or I’m saving yours, or we’re both having to command different things.” Shiro nodded his head. Matt was right, he never got to see him lately.

     “I know. I am grateful for the times you’ve saved my ass though.” Matt smirked.

     “Of course, someones gotta protect the national treasure.” Shiro swallowed his food and ended up choking as Matt’s sentence registered. Coughing into his hand a bit, Matt patted his back to help.

     “Oh please Matt, I’m pretty sure you’re the national treasure here with that hair and body.” Matt laughed as he pushed himself up and struck a pose. Shiro wolf-whistled, trying to contain his laughter as Matt made ridiculous poses.

     “I have no idea how I kept people at bay Shiro. I mean look at me, I should be locked up for these gorgeous looks.” Shiro snorted.

      “Okay Narcissus, save some for later.” Matt laughed a bit as he sat back down. The two didn’t say anything for a bit after that, Shiro eating the rest of his food and Matt fiddling with his gloves. Once Shiro finished his plate, he took it over to the washing window and slid it through. Walking back over to the table, he sat back down and folded his hands on the table.

     “Shiro, is it normal to be scared all the time?” Shiro shot his head over towards Matt who was already looking at him.

     “I’m not saying it’s affecting my ability to fight, I just wonder sometimes. We were back on Earth for a while, now we’re back in space. So much is happening and it’s serious. This is all life threating stuff. I could die, you could die, my sister could die, any one of us could die out here because these weapons are meant to kill. I sometimes lay awake at night, wondering what would happen if you died. I can’t bring myself to think about a life without you Shiro.” Shiro grabbed Matt’s shaking hands, the boy on the verge of tears now.

     “I don’t like talking about this, everyone is trying so hard I feel we don’t have time to worry about these things; but I worry so damn much. I just want my sister to be safe. She deserves to be with someone and show the world how smart and talented she is.” Shiro squeezed Matt’s hands.

     “And, what about you Matt? Don’t you want to have a happy life on Earth or some planet and live out the rest of your days doing what you love?” Matt nodded his head.

     “Yeah, I want to be with my sister and build wicked cool things. Things that will help bring the universe together for the better. But right now? I just want her to survive and I want you to survive. I would feel happier and more content living in a reality where my two favorite people are alive.” Shiro smiles at that, Matt isn’t looking at him anymore but he sounds a bit better having gotten this off his chest.

     “I promise you Matt, everyone here is looking out for the other person. Your sister wants you alive just as much as I do. We are all here for each other, don’t feel like you have to put it all on yourself to protect us.” Matt nods his head, wiping his eyes a bit and taking his hands back from Shiro’s grasp.

     “Thanks Shiro, you’re really an amazing friend.” Shiro smiles, this time Matt looking at him and smiling ever so softly back. Shiro wants to say something else, but what? He feels something in his stomach flutter and collide with his sides, but he pushes that down to reach out and hug his friend.

     “You’re a really amazing friend too Matt.”

* * *

 

     Shiro can feel it in him. Everything is wrong, this whole situation is wrong, they need to leave something bad is going to happen. Shiro fights against this sickening feeling taking over his entire body, he knows they can’t turn back, if they do the entire universe will be at stake. Looking out through the Atlas’s windows, Shiro barks out commands as he desperately tries to remain calm. Everyone follows each command perfectly and for a moment, Shiro doesn’t understand why something could go wrong.

     He’s asked to aid in the ground help, the rebels are trying to load civilians onto their ships but it’s not enough. The planet could go at any minute, just one more ship would be ideal. Shiro is moving before they finish, placing a helmet over his head and boarding a medium sized cruiser in under two minute. The planet is crumbling fast, Shiro can see it before he lands. He spots the rebels and the civilians, many rebels waving and looking grateful to have the help. Un-boarding the cruiser, Shiro quickly yells at any civilians close to him to get on. It’s a mad dash mess but right now that doesn’t matter, all that matters is getting them to safety.

     “THAT’S IT! WE NEED TO GO NOW THE PLANET IS ABOUT TO COLLAPSE!” Shiro nods his head and runs back into his cruiser, getting into the pilot’s seat. Watching the other rebel ships, he freezes when he sees the all too familiar green rebel ship and Matt the last to board. Shiro exhales, Matt’s okay, we’re going to be okay; but then there is a blast so ground shaking that Matt falls back and Shiro shakes in his seat, head hitting the side wall. His vision dances as he sees Matt struggling to get up as the planet begins to lose itself entirely. Matt looks towards the green ship and gives a hand signal, Shiro vaguely knows what it is and he’s screaming before he realizes it.

      The ship departs, hovering above the ground and taking off, Shiro one of the few left behind. Matt is sitting on the ground, trying desperately to remain still but everything is so unstable. Shiro wants to grab him, get him on his cruiser before it’s too late, but he know he can’t. He would be putting his passengers in danger and he knows Matt would want Shiro to put them first. Matt looks up, he locks eyes with Shiro and smiles. Shiro knows he is crying, he can tell Matt is too as sparkles seem to reflect off his face from the planets blinding sun hitting him.

     Everything is chaos, Shiro is torn in wanting to leave to save the civilians, or staying to try and save his best friend. He knows deep down he has to leave, the planets ground would crumple beneath the cruiser and most likely kill everyone. Shiro cries harder at that as he maintains eye contact with Matt, the light soon almost too blinding as the planet begins exploding from the inside out. Matt gives him a smile, brings his hand up, and gives Shiro a small salute. Soon Shiro is on autopilot as everyone is screaming at him and he finds himself back in the safe atmosphere of space, looking down on the crumbling planet that soon explodes into a beautiful mess of orange and rock. Shiro is screaming, he doesn’t know how but he knows he is and soon everything goes white.

* * *

 

     “Shiro? Shiro? Hey, come on dude wake up.” Shiro feels his head buzz upon hearing his name. He wants to open his eyes but he doesn’t know if he can. Feeling a hand on his face, he startles a bit at how cold it is.

     “Shiro, wake up, we need to talk.” Shiro opens his eyes groggily, everything is fuzzy and he can’t make out any details. He feels something soft under him, and it looks to be bright amongst his haze filled vision.

     “There you are, it’ll take a minute for everything to become clear.” Shiro blinks rapidly, everything is still pretty fuzzy but he decides to look over at the voice next to him. The person is blurry but Shiro can vaguely make out greys and oranges. Letting his eyes adjust for a few more minutes, everything comes into focus finally. Shiro screams a little as he backs away from the person in front of him.

     “Matt? No, no, no, no, no, you can’t be here you’re dead I saw you die!” Matt only smiles as he stares in silence at Shiro.

     “I am dead Shiro. I don’t know how but I am here with you in what I believe is a frozen pocket. Now come on, there’s something I want you to see.” Matt stands up and holds his hand out for Shiro to take. Shiro stares at it, not quite sure what to do. Matt rolls his eyes and urges Shiro to take it and he hesitantly does. It’s cold, not the warmth Shiro is used to. Matt doesn’t seem to care about the temperature differences as he links his fingers with Shiro’s and walks towards a doorway.

      Everything around Shiro is unfamiliar, it seems like a small shack of sorts as once he and Matt walk through the doorway they are outside. Outside, on Earth, on a beach. Shiro stops in his tracks.

      “Isn’t it beautiful? I was here for a few seconds before you arrived. I’ve always wanted to live on the beach, a relaxing place to waste away.” Shiro doesn’t know what to say, nothing makes sense.

      “Come on, I didn’t bring you out here to look at the scenery.” Matt tugs Shiro’s arm and leads him to the base where the water ends and dry sand begins. Matt walks a few paces into the ocean, Shiro stuck in sand.

       “Matt, please tell me what’s going on.” Matt gives him a confused look.

     “You’re here with me. We’re on a beach somehow. I’m dead.” Shiro wants to scream again.

      “Not that Matt, I mean, where are the other paladins? Is everyone else somehow dead? Am I in a coma where they are?” Matt sighs, but smiles sadly.

      “You, Shiro, are here with me. Everyone else is frozen, time is how you left it. I don’t know how, but I do know you have a choice. You’re somehow here in this pocket with me to make a choice because you were conflicted when I died. I can go on, and you can with me, or you can go back and I go on without you. Or, we stay here as you make your choice.” Shiro doesn’t know what to say. Matt’s still holding his hand and smiling at him, and in that moment he would pay anything to keep this image alive forever, but he has a duty to everyone else.

      “Matt, I, I can’t do this. I want to, I want to stay with you so much, but everyone else needs me. I have to be there for them.” Matt nods his head, still smiling that smile Shiro wishes he could make stop so Matt wouldn’t look so okay with the circumstances.

       “I know Shiro. I knew this would be an easy decision for you. Thank you for this moment at least.” Everything in this moment is so beautiful, Shiro couldn’t feel more at peace. However, he must go no matter how much he wants Matt to stay. Squeezing Matt’s hand still tucked into his, Shiro finally smiles.

     “Take care of my sister Takashi. Don’t let her do anything stupid okay?” Shiro nods his head.

      “And don’t let Keith do anything stupid either, or Lance. Make sure Coran is appreciated.” Shiro laughs.

      “Okay Matt I will.” Matt nods his head, tears clouding his vision as he tries to maintain his smile. Sniffling, he brings his other hand up to cup Shiro’s face.

      “Take care Shiro.” Shiro nods his head, he wants to say more, he can feel Matt wanting to too, but neither spill.

      “I’ll see you soon.” Matt lets a few tears fall at that. Taking a deep breath, he lets go of Shiro’s hand and face and turns around. Walking off further into the ocean, Matt dissolves with each step before he is nothing but glitter on the surface. Shiro is only left alone a moment longer before he feels a sudden pain in his chest and everything goes black.

* * *

 

      “SHIRO!? SHIRO CAN YOU HEAR ME? SHIRO!” Shiro jolts awake. He sees the planet still bright and a mess, many passengers are surrounding him with worried faces, and Keith is screaming into his head.

      “KEITH! Yes, sorry I am here. Heading back now!” Keith gives a sigh as Shiro pilots the cruiser towards the Atlas. None of the passengers comment on what just happened, merely chalking it up to the shock of seeing his friend die. Putting one hand over his jaw, Shiro can still vaguely feel the imprint of Matt’s palm.

      Making it back to the Atlas, Shiro helps unload the passengers and get many to the medical wing. Once everyone is cleared, Shiro heads back to the bridge and nods at everyone. Coran gives him a wary look and Shiro simply smiles. Seeing the last bits of Voltron’s battle, Shiro greets the paladins once they are back onboard. It’s not till he sees Pidge that he remembers the news he has to tell her and her family.

* * *

 

      When the war is officially over, Allura safely in a pod for healing, and Altea back despite it being destroyed, a funeral is held. It’s held at the Garrison and attended by thousands who all knew Matt or interacted with him in some way. The remaining Holt family members all make different speeches, tears bursting not even halfway through each time. Shiro is asked to speak as well, and he finds it hard to contain himself as he tries to put into words just how much Matt meant to him.

      There is no body to burry, but a casket is lowered down into the ground anyways. Many fill it with things all relating back to Matt Holt. Pictures, mementos, cards, letters, even flowers, all placed on top of one another. Shiro places an orange carnation and a picture of him and Matt that he took back in their Garrison days. It’s the only picture he has left, but he has more saved in his mind.

      Once the casket is lowered and many have departed, Shiro finds himself staring at the freshly placed grass unable to move. He feels numb and cold, unsure of what to do now that another part of him is gone. He still has Keith, an equally precious part of his life, but even Keith cannot fill the hole others could. There was no reason for him to feel so glum, Matt died valiantly, and Shiro would make sure his name would go down in history. However, he never got to say what he wanted to say. He would never be able to tell Matt, at least now, how much he truly cared for him.

_‘Oh god Takashi, if you’re this glum now, how will you survive seeing your hair start to thin?’_ Shiro spins around. No one is around him, a few people who are still around are too far away to have whispered to him.

_‘It’s not one of them, try again.’_ Shiro turns again, but he can’t tell where the voice is coming from. Continuing to scan the grounds, Shiro feels an urge to look off towards a hill to his left. Turning so he can fully view the hill, Shiro freezes when he see none other than Matt Holt smirking in a white suit.

_‘Couldn’t miss my own funeral. Shame I have to go though. Miss me?’_ Shiro doesn’t even have to say always, he knows Matt already knows the answer. Receiving one last smirk from him, Shiro watches as Matt fades, a laugh on his lips that makes Shiro smile since the day began.

* * *

 

      Dying isn’t something Shiro knows how to describe. It reminds him of an experience he had in his fighting days, but even then he didn’t really die. The white light and small second of confusion is the same though, and Shiro doesn’t dare open his eyes if it’s not real. The sensations feel the same though, and he can faintly smell salt.

     “Oh come on you bag of bones, I’ve been alone for fifty some years, least you could do is open your eyes and talk to me.” Shiro opens his eyes and shoots up. He knows that voice, has dreamed about it every night since that day. Looking towards him, Shiro feels his entire body warm up at the sight of the only other person in the room.

     “Hey Shiro, glad to see you finally made it.” Shiro feels tears prick at his vision. Reaching out, he grabs Matt around his shoulders and hugs him. He’s warm this time, and he feels soft and bright somehow.

     “Glad to finally be here.” Matt wraps his arms around Shiro’s waist and squeezes. Shiro never wants to let go, instead staying like this forever. But he can’t just yet.

     “Matt.”

     “Yes, Shiro?”

     “I love you.”

     “You’re an idiot Takashi Shirogane.” Matt pulls away from Shiro to look him in the eyes.

     “You’re an idiot to think I never knew.” Shiro can only blush.

     “I’m sorry I never said it out loud.” Matt shakes his head, a smile on his face.

     “You never needed to.” Shiro nods his head.

     “And now Shiro, I am going to kiss you after waiting so long to do so.” Shiro didn’t hesitate to meet Matt halfway. After so long, he finally feels at peace.

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY ENDING SEE! Please don't kill me. Anyways, what did you guys think! This is the only one shot with angst of sorts, everything else i write post-s8 will be happy and how it should have been. Thank you so much for reading!!!!!
> 
> Come yell at me on my tumblr: @blackpaladincoran


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